Outlaw fake dating app profiles, says woman tricked into affair
Anna Rowe, who was duped by a married man using a false photo and name on Tinder, calls on government to take action
Anne Rowe, 44, fell in love with a man who used the name Antony Ray and said he was a businessman who regularly travelled abroad for work. Ray used a picture of the Bollywood star Saif Ali Khan on the popular dating app.
Rowe, a teaching assistant from Canterbury, and Ray exchanged thousands of messages and even spoke of marriage. But after nearly a year, Rowe, who has two children, learned her lover was a London lawyer with a wife and children. He was also having relationships with other women.
She now wants the government to force people to use their real names on dating websites to prevent so-called catfishing – the act of creating fake identities online to trick people into relationships.
“This man used me like a personal hotel with benefits under the guise of wanting the romantic, loving relationship he knew I craved,” Rowe told Kent Online.
“He broke my trust, took away my right to choose. I did not consent to having a relationship with a married man, or a man who was actively having relations with multiple women simultaneously.”
After using fake photos on Tinder, Ray eventually sent Rowe real photos of himself and the two met in person. He visited her twice a week for six months, telling her he often went to Germany and Ireland for work.
Rowe became suspicious after Ray grew more distant – saying his mother was ill. His visits became less frequent and Rowe did not see him for five months.
She eventually went back on Tinder and found Ray active on there. She used a fake profile to contact him, and he told her the same things as when they first started chatting.
Rowe revealed her real identity and their relationship ended. She said: “He told me his head had been a mess over his mum, who by then he had also told me had had a series of mini strokes, some with lasting speech conditions. He wasn’t looking for a relationship until things were settled at home, maybe then we could start again.
“Worst of all was finding out he was married. Everything that hadn’t added up over the months, all the red flags and bad gut feelings over things that I had felt and pushed aside because I trusted him more than I did myself, or he had given me a reasonable answer to a question or I’d told myself I was being paranoid.”
Rowe has started a petition for catfishing to be made a crime. “I am a victim of a catfish approach,” she said. “Using a fake profile and online identity as a platform to lure women or men for sex should be illegal, but it’s not.
“The result is the other party believing they are beginning a real relationship with the hope of a future together and having sex is part of that believed relationship.”
source:https://www.theguardian.com